Well, I arrived in Trinidad on Friday afternoon. I got through immigration and customs very smoothly! Got my one, burnt orange suitcase, and immediately when I stepped outside of the airport, Mitch found me. He introduced me to his wife (Vidia), his youngest daughter, Emily (ha), and a few friends they brought along. Then we drove to Valencia and to the school to pick up his two other children, Joshua and Ellia. We got to there home, which is now my home for the next 7 weeks, and I tried to settle in. Later, we went to a neighbor/friend's house and went swimming! They had one of those 5 ft. deep pools you can set up in your yard. What fun. Later in the night, I was able to meet some of the church leaders and get to know them and have them get to know me.
Yesterday was Saturday, their relaxing day, which worked very well for me. Traveling is exhausting! Today we got up early for church. It was ironically their "Missions Sunday". I was asked to share a little about myself and my reason for being here and interest in missions. Though I spoke for only a few minutes, it went well, despite my fear of public speaking.
One little surprise was that Mitch told me yesterday that I would be discipling 3 young women while I'm here...this was there first I'd heard of that. One girl, probably in her mid 20's is a new believer! I can tell she is excited for learning. Another girl I met today is 11. I think Mitch just wants interaction for her with me, an older girl and believer. I have yet to meet the third girl.
Please be praying for my interactions with these girls! I'm a little nervous. I want to be able to minister effectively to them and for them to walk away with something tangible. (That is also kind of expected of me, because I will be having weekly Skype meetings with leaders on the World Team team, who want updates and to see progress being made).
I know God has brought me here for a specific purpose. I think I am now finding out what that purpose is. I've always had a fear of preaching to people. For some reason I think I'll do it badly or mess up or won't end up helping anyone. I've always been timid because deep down, I don't think that I KNOW enough to be someone who disciples others. I'm not a very good speaker and I let that be an excuse. (I remember being terrified of the devotions-time-of-the-day when I was a camp counselor. Even to girls half my age, I thought I couldn't teach them something valuable.)
The TRUTH is, I may not be the most educated on the Bible, I may not be the most persuasive speaker, I may stumble over words and be scared and intimidated. But that is NO reason not to speak. I have the most precious thing inside of me... I have the love of Jesus Christ. I have salvation. That alone is more than enough to speak.
I know that these 3 girls already know that much. They all already believe the Jesus is God's Son who came to die for our sins. We share that belief and that love. Now, it is my turn to depend completely on God to work through me so that I can help these girls in their walk with Christ. They want to learn and the want me to teach them.
Last night, a friend helped me in my mini panic attack. She was able to encourage me and remind me that "fear is NOT from God." I praise God for that time that I got to spend talking with her! Thank you God for giving her to me to tell me that I can do this. God loves me and all He wants from me is that in all that I do, the glory is His.
God knew what He was doing when He brought me here. He's tricky that way.... giving me this opportunity to learn more about HIM and trust in Him. Today in church, we heard a message on Philip preaching the Good News to the Ethiopian in his chariot. But previously in the chapter, Philip and the rest of apostles were scattered throughout the land because persecution broke out in their church in Jerusalem. They were comfortable in Jerusalem. But God had to bring persecution to their church so that they would GO.
It makes me wonder. Did God bring me here to face a huge fear of mine because I wasn't listening to Him at home? Was I that stubborn that God had to place me in this situation with these 3 girls desiring for me to teach them so that I couldn't say "no"?
I am thankful for every trial because it brings perseverance and perseverance must must finish it's work so that I may be complete, not lacking anything (James 1: 2-4). I am thankful that I will be learning trust. I now am truly dependent on God for guidance and wisdom as I try to disciple these girls. Praise be to God for any good that comes out of whatever will happen in my sessions with them. I know that I am imperfect, that I will not be perfect in my teaching. But I ask that God will give me grace as I do my best to help these girls mature. Once again, please be praying for me along the way and feel free to ask questions about how it's going and/or give advice!
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